Coventry
Black shoes, black eye... kinda cool...
Alrighty! Time for a little bit of good ol' fashion violence to spice things up!

So, I decide that I'm sick of Stratford and want to go out and explore... and I plan on going to the next major town in the area, Coventry. I even rent an "apartment" for the night (it was a bed and breakfast... still have no idea why they all call them things apartments...).

Turns out that Coventry is just a big giant mall with an old church in ruins from a bombing during some war... But it gave me a chance to shop for good shoes (the clubs that I've gone to all had this dress policy thing that specifically states that no Rugby shirts, futbol jerseys, or twenty dollar Sketchers bought in "the States" allowed). I was all happy that I found a pair of fifteen pound boots (the price of the shoes... actually, probably the weight of the boots as well, 'cause they're heavy as fuck) and I was skipping along to the happy jingle in my head when I was mugged walking back to my "apartment."

It was kinda funny actually, aside from the blood and bruises.... No! really!

They don't really believe in traffic lights in that part of the country, I guess. So there are these little underground walkways that act as pedestrian crossings of major streets. As I emerge from the pedestrian "subway" (as they like to be called) I am beaten to the ground by the blue-eyed devil! =)

Sorta.

Here's a little reenactment:

Kimothy struts through the subway, a little awkwardly in his new boots, slight smile on his face while swinging a bag of newly purchased merchandise from local stores, fully free of any trace of buyers' regret. He also uses the umbrella he just bought for the abrupt changes in English weather as a walking stick. He sports a nifty outfit that's pretty stylish, but the threads are obviously not marketed toward British consumers, and his bad-ass new Minolta is tied to his belt (i.e. he looks like a stereotypical Japanese tourist).

Enter Mugger.

Mugger accosts Kimothy. Grabs his umbrella and breaks it with on hand trying to look menacing.

Mugger (in a strong English accent):
You betta give me your money or else I'm going to hurt ya.

Kimothy (dazzled by the sophistication in English accents gazes reverently at the young man with a slight smile on his face):
Huh?

Mugger:
I mean it. Give me your money.

Kimothy:
But there are people behind us!

Mugger (points behind Kimothy):
They're old! and (points to his friend that appears out of nowhere) it's two against one!

Kimothy:
Huh?

Mugger:
I mean it, give me your money!

Kimothy (slightly ghetto):
Hells, no!

Mugger punches Kimothy repeatedly to prove his point while Kimothy yells for help. Mugger runs away as people arrive.

Eh. It's all good.
It didn't stop me from taking a cab to the club in town and walking past the bouncer in my brand new funky fifteen pound boots.